We admire people who are courageous. Better yet, we are inspired by them. They are giants in our eyes, whatever their physical stature. Even the smallest person can be a giant, a ‘force of nature’, if they are courageous.
What could you become, if you had a little more courage?
We could all do with a bit more courage. At least, I know I could. Anyone know any one selling courage in a bottle? I wish!…I don’t mean drugs. Although drugs can disinhibit us and give us a temporary ‘courage’ (if we can even call it that), it’s not always appropriate to be ‘under the influence’ and it certainly isn’t always healthy. I don’t think that the benefit of drug-induced ‘courage’ outweighs the costs.
Holding Back From Your Dream?
One of the biggest things that kept me from starting off on my dream of become a pilot was fear. How paradoxical then that one of the biggest things that made me finally pursue my dream of becoming a pilot was fear.
Fear can keep you from trying new things, from expressing yourself fully and from making yourself vulnerable. However, fear isn’t only an inhibiting force. It can enable you to run faster than you ever have, jump higher than you ever thought you could and endure far more than you ever have.
I’ve had the dream and hope of becoming a pilot, for as long as I can remember. That was the carrot. It was calling me forth, to an adventure unlike any I had ever embarked on. Interestingly, I didn’t do much about it. I stayed in my comfort zone, waiting to pursue my dream at a more convenient time.
What Will Happen If You Don’t Try?
What sprung me into action was the development of a new, more powerful fear than that which held me back. Instead of being shackled by the fear of what would happen if I went for my dream, I was pushed by the fear of what would happen if I didn’t.
I realised that life could actually pass me by, that I could spend another another 6 years, and then another, and another, and never get any closer to my dream.
I became afraid of being an old man and having my dream turn into nothing more than a bitter regrets. I became afraid of living a life of insignificance, doing everything other than the very thing I’m most passionate about.
I am afraid of becoming the kind of person I would become, if I were to allow fear to shackle and keep me from the righteous pursuit of living my dream. That person is neither the kind of person I would admire, nor the kind of person I would be inspired by.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not suggesting that fear is the best fuel or motivator to get anyone to their goal. Hope is a powerful, sustainable and enduring force.
I’m just saying, if you must fear, fear what would happen if you didn’t pursue that which you know to be the most valuable pursuit, even in your own estimation.
Live your dreams. After all, is there anything better to do?
For more on how I’m getting on with learning to fly, check me out on the YouTube.👊🏾
One of the mantras that has kept me focused this week is, “keep the main thing, the main thing”. When I shared it with colleagues in the staffroom, during our lunch break, my mantra was met with a, ‘huh?’, along with an expression like that of a cow staring at a new gate. Hopefully I can do better this time around.
Aviate. Navigate. Communicate.
As a student pilot, there is so much for me to learn and it is easy to become task saturated in the cockpit – having much to do and not much time to do it in. Of course, I have my flight instructor with me, but only for now. At some point, it will be all down to me. As such, it is important for me to be able to separate what needs to be done immediately from what can wait – I must prioritise. If I don’t, I could easily end up a statistic.
Everyday, we are thrown into numerous situations requiring us to navigate an insane amount of choices and arbitrate between competing priorities. We encounter people who have their own agendas and if we are not careful, their agenda inadvertently becomes our agenda, and before we know it, we are further away from our goals and desires.
As a student pilot I have to learn to fly the aeroplane, to navigate and to communicate with the appropriate Air Traffic Service Unit. Inevitably, there are times when these 3 priorities clash. I might find myself in a position where I am lost, not in complete control of the aircraft whilst also being required to respond to a call.
There are 3 really important things to do in this situation: fly the plane, fly the plane and fly the plane! It cannot be overstated. If I lose control of the plane and find myself plummeting to the ground, navigating and communicating become somewhat irrelevant to my outcome.
Identify Your Goal In Any Given Situation
“If you aim at nothing, you will hit every time.”
Zig Ziglar
One of the great things about the mantra I have been using is that it prompts me to identify what my true priority is in that moment. This was particularly useful when I was frustrated due to feeling like things were not going the way I wanted them to go. As such, I realised I didn’t have to win every single battle and have everything go my way. I only needed one specific thing out of my day, out of my interaction or whatever situation I was in.
Consider what you are doing now. What is your goal? What is the main thing? You may have to wrestle with your goals and desires a while before the true priority reveals itself. Your priority, your main thing, will differ with each situation. It might be to listen, to think, to plan, to simply get started, to create a terrible first draft, to be playful, to be yourself, to save money, to collect data, to support, to rest, to learn something new or to progress, and so on.
Distractions are everywhere, available free of charge. Some distractions are clear, while others come in a disguise. Like cunning thieves, distractions can steal your resources – time, money, energy – and leave you further from your goal. To give yourself the best chance of reaching your goal and living your dream, make sure you keep the main thing, the main thing.
The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.
“You can have more than what you’ve got, because you can become more than what you are.“
Jim Rohn
Ever had a nice, hot shower on a cold winter’s morning? Ah, the feeling is like no other. Twisting and turning as you scramble to send the streams of water cascading down every part of your body, leaving you with that warm, fuzzy feeling.
Ever turned the tap to ‘cold’ by accident? Oh it sucks, right?! (to borrow the concise and accurate American phrase.) What, then, would posses a man, such as myself, to intentionally turn the tap cold? Why is it important to do something that ‘sucks’ everyday?
I grew up dreaming of becoming a pilot from an early age. After years of procrastinating, I finally turned that dream into a goal and started this amazing here adventure. (Seeabout me.) A mental transformation was necessary to make progress possible. Doing something that sucks everyday contributed massively to my mental transformation.
“Unless you change how you are, you will always have what you’ve got.”
Jim Rohn
Life’s Unchangeables
Love it or hate it, like it or lump it, there are some things in life that we just can not change. I don’t have to be prophet or fortune teller to know that we will face diverse trials and challenges, throughout life. I consider this, one of life’s unchangeables.
We may not know the nature, the scale and the duration of the challenges to come, but we know that they will come. No amount of protesting, voting or detesting can cancel that truth. Just look at the current sitch with the vid virus.
The Bottomless Questions
Consider these questions. How much potential do you have? What are you capable of achieving? If you really put your mind to it, what could you become? How will you become more than what you currently are? I grapple with these bottomless questions everyday. Can you relate?
What Will You Become?
There is a huge difference between facing a challenge, and being faced with a challenge. The former makes you stronger, more courageous and a force to be reckoned with. The latter makes you smaller, weaker and more pathetic.
Psychologists say that the moment you decide to willingly face your challenges, you reduce the stress response and activate the exploratory circuit in your brain.
There is a world of difference, psychologically, between accidentally turning the tap cold, and experiencing the same thing as the result of an intentional decision.
Intentionality takes you out of ‘reaction’ and into ‘action’; out of the role of victim and into a position of power. Note: Just because you are a victim doesn’t mean you have to play the role of victim.
Why Should You Do Something That Sucks Every Day?
1. It Is Good For You. Whatever you do should take you beyond the bounds of your comfort zone and bring you a bunch of benefits, all at the same time. See some examples below.
2. It Increases Your Mental Toughness. Overcoming a healthy, mental challenge everyday will help you build mental toughness and resilience. If you are reading this, you’ve probably lived long enough to know how necessary those qualities are.
3. It Makes You More Fearless. At one time, I left letters unopened for months, for fear of the ‘demons’ that would jump out, so to speak. Now, I look forward to negotiating whatever problems pounce out of the envelopes. Well, at least I do most of the time. The difference is stark, like night and day.
In completing your daily, self-directed challenge, you learn that you are the kind of person that can confront challenges and overcome them, despite dread and discomfort.
4. It Sets You Up For The Day. The challenge is a great way to gift yourself a win, right at the start of your day. Start your day as a courageous conqueror and establish a positive pattern for success.
5. ItIncreases Your Trust In Your Ability to Develop. As your challenge gets easier and easier, because your mind is getting tougher and tougher, you realise that you are the kind of person that can get better, stronger and tougher, with time.
Examples: My Daily Challenges
Cold Shower for 10+ seconds, after a warm shower. It really wakes me up and raises my energy level to the roof. You should definitely try it if you struggle to be ‘awake’ in the morning.
Running, whatever the weather. I started off with a five minute run and built up to a 2-mile daily run, before going to work. I do this 5-days every week. It gets the body going and oxygen circulating, among many other benefits.
100 pushups and sit-ups, to maintain my strength during lockdown. Over time, I have been able to complete the challenge in fewer sets (although this can fluctuate).
Waking Up Early. I haven’t found anyone who is successful in the same kind of way that I want to be successful, who wakes up after 7am. Being up early allows you to do the productive things you need to do for you, before the world places external demands on your time, energy and other limited resources. (See ‘How To Waste Your Time More Effectively’)
Reading/Listen to a Chapter a Day. Success is simply the result of applying good ideas everyday. In taking in those good ideas, written by people who overcame challenges of their own, you equip yourself with the tools to overcome your own challenges and build your own success.
Giving Up My Bed. No more ‘lay-ins’. Giving up my bed and sleeping on the floor or on a recliner armchair for a year was great for my back but it also meant that when it was time to get up, it was time to get up. There was no bed ‘calling my name’ anymore.
Writing. I am writing this sentence at 6.44 am, on Thursday 25th February 2021. I have been writing first thing every morning this week. The aim was to wake up at 5am everyday. I failed at times but the writing was not negotiable so I compromised other things to make sure I still got it done first thing. (See ‘Why You Should Be Enthusiastic About Failing’)
Note: My routines generally apply 5-days in the week. I throw the rule book out of the window on ‘rest’ day and use the next day to get back up to speed with a minimally structured day.
“Keep your commitment to your commitment.”
Les Brown
In conclusion…
Doing something that ‘sucks’ everyday is one of the keys that helped me unlock progress towards my childhood dream, after procrastinating for a decade.
Isn’t it amazing that something so simple can have such a deep, dynamic impact on your mind, your character and therefore, your future. It’s the same kind of amazing simplicity that is packed into a small seed which grows into a much bigger tree, and bears much fruit.
It’s not the things we do occasionally that have the greatest effect, but rather that which we do every single day that disproportionately impacts our destination in life.
Remember, there is a huge difference between facing a challenge, and being faced with a challenge. The former makes you stronger, more courageous and a force to be reckoned with. The latter makes you smaller, weaker and more pathetic over time.
Never allow challenges to face you without you facing them, as best as you can. Start your practise by doing something that ‘sucks’ but makes you stronger and better, on a daily basis.
“In life, we don’t get what we want. We get what we have to have… We don’t get our ‘should’, we get our ‘must’“.
